These relationships will always fail because they are based on expectations out of one's control. You can't expect anything from your "partner" because they'll always/eventually fall short. To cultivate understanding, and treat relationships from a point of love rather than partnership is more likely to have a desirable outcome. People are not perfect and when they interact with each other, that interaction is supposed to have compromises from both sides and most modern ideas leave no room for that. If a man knows that they are able to lead or be relied upon, they'll eventually take that for granted and/or abuse it. This doesn't mean that men can't be counted on. It just means that they are just human. That is also why women who marry with the idea that they are doing so to benefit men will always have terribly sorry married lives. You just can't place expectations on anyone. It's better if we all learn how to build on each other's strengths and compensate on the weaknesses. Gender roles make relationships a scam because of how they make us put expectations on each other.